Chapter 191: Salmon Head’s Advice Part 1

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How does the Salmon head allow you to see, exactly? Does it reflect light in some kind of way? No, I forget that this is a game, questioning every single detail won’t bring me any good.
So best not to think about it too much.
But oh my God, it stinks so bad.

 

「I wonder if at this rate I would completely turn into one of them…… I do get a feeling that a scenario like that would not be too far-fetched.」

 

「I’m sorry for asking this, but see if you can bend your arms or legs in directions in which they should not ever be bent.
Preferably way beyond the capacity of human joints.」

 

Even though the subconscious need to not inflict self-harm onto myself was still there, I could indeed bend my arms and legs in directions where it should normally be impossible to do so.
But only to some extent.
But this is actually very convenient.
I can definitely incorporate this newfound ability of mine into my battle style.

 

「And how about that Straude kid?」

 

「I haven’t shown this to him yet, but you can be damn sure that I will do that.」

 

But as luck would have it, stupid shithead should still be cowering in fear under the bed.
Hee…… Hoo…… Fueeh…… Fuhihihi……

 

「UUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!」

 

「GYAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!?!?!?!?!?」

 

「I SHALL DRAG YOU INTO THE DEPTHS OF THE REALM OF THE DEAD, UUUOOOHHH~!!!!!!」

 

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「NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! I DON’T WANNA! I DON’T WANNA! HHHHHHHHHIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!」

 

It was all an imitation, but a rather convincing one.
All thanks to the know-how from various survival-horror games I have played that featured zombies.
Because of that I was able to act like a real zombie in a quite convincing way if I do say so myself.

 

As a confirmation, Straude started to scream while falling into a real frenzy.
Then he got up, started to run around like an idiot and hit his head quite hard as a result.
It also appears that he has lost consciousness as a result.

 

「Oh shit…… No, no, no, see, you’re not dead.
You’re not bursting into polygons, see?」

 

「I feel like my heart is about to burst out of my chest!」

 

It’s okay, humans were created to be mentally strong creatures.
Unless a chain of misfortune continues to strike on us, we can recover from almost any sort of trauma……

 

His Father was kidnapped by the fish people, is currently missing and is most probably dead.

 

Got lost in this monster-ridden city due to his own careless behavior.

 

He probably wandered right into the school of fish zombies and got turned into fish food or even worse.

 

「Fuuuh, talk about a triple combo, huh?」

 

「Yo, is he dying or what……?」

 

No, wait just a second, Rust-san.
He’s not dead, he’s not dead.
At least I think.
He can still do his best, right? Right?

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Since I was receiving so much negativity under my address from literally everyone present, for now I have decided to put the salmon head away back to my inventory.
I was also forced to put my original bird-head mask on.

 

And seeing by how much hatred I have managed to get on me, I was starting to wonder if maybe it was some kind of a hidden ability of this item.
There must be some explanation, but right now I had no way of actually investigating that matter.

 

However, it seems that the salmon head has way better defensive stats when compared to my usual bird-head mask.
If you wish to tell me that I’ll be able to tank even a dragon breath to the face with this thing I will kill you with my laughter.

 

「Mold, go back to normal, why don’t you?」

 

「It’s okay, I’m okay…… Fufu.」

 

「Who would have thought that we could be so considerate.」

 

For now I was sitting in the corner of the room on my own, because the group thought that Straude might have an actual heart attack upon waking up and seeing a giant talking salmon right in front of his face.

 

I was sitting right there, feeling really sad, swinging my head from left to right like a metronome, with Emul still sitting right on top of it.
Meanwhile Rust and Mold raise Straude and show him the cutlass.

 

「Get up…… I said get up you stupid shithead!」

 

「Ugh, ughngh…… A fish speaking human tongue……」

 

「………」

 

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「Fugyuh!?」

 

A good old straight chop through the middle of the face should do the trick nicely here.

 

Just as I thought about that, Straude started to regain consciousness, looking as though he had no idea where he was at the current moment.

 

「Ugh, nghngh…… Where am I……?」

 

「Who gave you permission to go to sleep? Just be useful for a change and have a look at this.」

 

「……? It’s just your simple cutlass…… Wait a minute! This is……!」

 

I knew it, so it was an event flag after all.
With his eyes wide open and lips quivering, Straude looks at the cutlass as if he wanted to burn a hole through it.
Or, to be more specific, he was staring at the emblem of the red whale that was carved into the cutlass’s handle.

 

「Th, this! This! This is! Where, where did you……!?」

 

「My god, so noisy.」

 

I think to myself that if he does not shut up there would be a serious need of silencing him myself, but even so I present to him the possible clues about his father.

 

「I have found it in this city…… Umm, it was a possession of a very strong monster.」

 

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「Then…… Then…… Does that mean that Papa is……」

 

「And here you go, mumbling to yourself again……」

 

I understand how you must feel.
But just so you know, not everyone is just like you, and some of us like to take the risks, unless the possible penalties or death is not way to probable.

 

Well now, what should I do? Since I do realize that none of those guys are really good with roleplaying and stuff.

 

No, really, I get it, I really understand it, you know?

 

Sometimes there is no need for role play.
Sometimes there are just certain characters or races that can say what needs to be said all natural and without much effort.
But more often than not you need to be the one who says the exact words that the NPC needs to hear.

 

We are both players who tend to look at the plot of the game from a bird-eye’s perspective.
That’s just who we are.
And that is why it should be my own time to shine in a time like this.

 

「Oh well, I guess it cannot really be helped.
Just leave it to me.」

 

I have no idea how this whole even is going to turn out in the end, but I guess it is better than just sit on your ass while holding the cutlass to your chest and weep all day.

 

「Boy, are you really okay with that?」

 

「Eh?」

 

I can see from the way that he was holding this thing that this NPC was accustomed to handling a weapon like that.

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